SIDELINES OF MARRIAGE

                                  

There is an old saying that marriages are decided in heaven. Who and when said this? Imagine about our forefathers of lakhs of years ago leading a bestial life and hardly ever thinking that in future, sex life of human beings will be channelized by an institution, known as marriage. Where was that heaven or God those days?  If the first man was born (according to some historians) some 14 crore years back, where was this superman then and why he could not conceive the idea in the heaven of finalizing marriages?

By far the marriage was brought into vogue by the men who left the forest life in third millennium BC, had his own house and decided to lead a family life. In entire human history, the God, whether He is there or not, has proved to be the oldest and greatest policeman. Even today, several crimes are not perpetrated because it is construed that He punishes such anti-social elements. As a matter of fact these early men wisely thought that the open sex would disturb social equilibrium and so decided to allot one woman to every man. So that each remained loyal to the other, they applied sacrosance to this institution by declaring it to be the heavenly will. It was such a lopsided decision that the husband was supposed to be next to God and the wife could arrange her deliverance by  ungrudgingly serving him. In last two hundred years, the advent of modern education has encouraged the fairsex, always at the receiving end to challenge this injustice.

A man in most of communities can practise polygamy but not a woman. On the death of the wife, the man can easily re-marry. If the husband dies even two days after the marriage, the innocent Hindu bride will have to lead a stoic way of living lifelong. What is her fault if the bridegroom died in an accident or some natural calamity? Widows in such societies are hated like a cursed lot and are forcibly kept away from festive occasions. Remember the inhuman ‘Sati”. They cannot opt for any colour other than white, cannot touch non-veg food and cannot make-up to make themselves presentable. Can a man be subjected to these cruelties whose wife died? Obviously the womenfolk are so outraged as they being physically inferior, cannot resist. Moreover, due to lack of education and being shrouded in blidfaith, they  tune themselves to thinking that the heaven had fated them to be so.

Let the society come boldly forward to relieve them from this predicament. We will have to realize that if there is any God in this nuptial knot, He cannot be only for men. Marriage is just a social institution consummated by men for its smooth running without any providential interference. If meeting together of a boy and girl is welcome, why when they cannot smoothly go ahead, separation should be equally easy and healthy? If the man is fatally diseased, morally wretched or having some highly objectionable traits in his personality, the other party has every right to bid adieu. The modern marriages are done in courts and so are the divorce cases. Unfortunately, the divorce is not treared honourably in our society. It is a legal arrangement to come out of a problematic wedlock which has gone beyond redemption.

To conclude, we wish every boy and girl to be happily married but also suggest that in the eventuality of disturbed conjugal life, there is no harm in trying peaceful and legal separation. So, if marriage is heavenly, so is the divorce.